Couples and the Frustration of Illness
When two people choose to build their lives together, they often have a master plan of their goals, dreams and the things they want to accomplish. Many of them talk about how many children they will have, where they will live, and they often discuss how wonderful the golden years of retirement and grandchildren will be for them. While each of them are willing to vow that they will take care of each other over the years, few of them really understand what an acute illness can do to their lives and relationship. It can happen at any time, and it can be frustrating for each of them.
At any time
There is no guarantee in the world that will ensure a person will remain mentally and physically healthy until the day they pass, but those with a partner often skip over this issue lightly. A severe and devastating illness can occur at any time in a person’s life, and their spouse will be the one who is there for them. Few of them realise how frustrating many illnesses can be, and they often hide or bottle up their frustrations. It can be more devastating to the healthy spouse when they see their loved one suffer, and it is even worse when the couple is younger.
Overwhelmed is a normal emotion
Taking care of a spouse who is mentally or physically ill requires a great deal of responsibility, and it can be overwhelming at any given moment. Those who refuse assistance and insist on doing everything alone are trying to make their world normal, and they are robbing themselves and their spouse of a chance to get help for the issues that are common at this time. They might feel shame or embarrassment that they are having difficulty dealing with being overwhelmed, but it is a normal emotion when these events occur. Admitting they are overwhelmed can be the first step in finding help for both of them.
The frustrations add up
When a spouse is severely ill, it can be frustrating to deal with the many different doctors, caregivers and issues related to it. Their spouse might find they feel alone with the situation, and they do not know where to turn for help and advice. All of their daily worries can add up to massive frustration, so they need to find support from knowledgeable people as soon as possible. There are ways to deal with the frustration of almost any situation, but it generally comes from someone who has been down that path to get useful help that can ease the many tensions that will build over time.
Few young couples really understand how much they will be tested as life progresses, but many of them who have a partner fall ill do their very best to ensure their partner has the best care possible. They will give up everything they have to ensure the one they love gets what they need, but few of them understand their partner needs them to find help dealing with the situation. Those who do find help are a step ahead in ensuring their ill partner has a better life.